Worst things that can happen in bed with a hot girl way out of your league
Did you ever get a drunk girl home and make her run out screaming? This is probably why.
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Worst things that can happen in bed with a hot girl way out of your league is a public top list created by OlaPola on rankly.com on July 24th 2012. Items on the Worst things that can happen in bed with a hot girl way out of your league top list are added by the rankly.com community and ranked using our secret ranking sauce. Worst things that can happen in bed with a hot girl way out of your league has gotten 1.437 views and has gathered 9 votes from 3 voters. O O
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So I've been busted a few times over the years. Sometimes the ones doing the busting just walked out, face red and mind scarred, and other times, more interesting stuff happens. The most resent was when I was with my girlfriend in her room. She's 5 years younger than me, so her parents are really protective, even though it's legal. So it was like 02.00 am in the night, and she was riding me in her bed, I was also cuffed, cause she thinks it's funny. Cute, right? Not so funny when the dad decides to walk in, turn the lights on, and start, wait for it, a casual conversation. Yeah. How was our day? What's up tomorrow, aren't we gonna sleep soon? It was a nightmare. I was cuffed to a bed, naked, dick hard as wood, girl on top of me, and her father talking to us like he ran into us on the bus stop. Another time, with an x of mine, we were baby sitting my sisters kid, he was about 5 or 6. So we put him to bed ans started making out on my sisters big bed. After a while, mid sex actually, my mom came to pick us up. Can't remember why, we could easily have walked home, but no. What happened was almost worst than the conversation thing. She just stared at us, jaw dropped like she had just seen.... well, her only son fuck a girl, doggy style. I remember thinking; "fuck. we should have gone with a more classy position". So I drag my dick out, and we tried to cover up, mom still staring, wide eyes, and the girl let's the loudest queef in the history of man slip out. the neighbors probably heard, they probably thought "OH MY GOD, THAT'S DISGUSTING" or something like that. Anyway, the queef seems to make my mom to snap out of the trance, and she walked away like a zombie looking for brains. After that I didn't get laid for a few days, we were pretty shooked up. So, 14 year olds planning sex, here's my advice: LOCK THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Sometimes, a good lay comes along in the strangest times. Like when you're having a week off of work and haven't showered in 4 days. When the girl then grasps you dirty dick, she WILL notice the smell, shw WILL notice that the glans is sticky like treacle, and she will be disgusted by it, just like you would be disgusted if you touched a girl and she had lumpy, yellow liquid oozing out her crack.
You're a funny guy, you talk a lot. Sometimes too much. Nothing is worse than having a girl telling you to shut the fuck up while boning her. It's not that terrible if you say stuff like "baby, damn you're sexy", but when things like "your name is Caroline, right?" That's where it starts to fall apart. Some things are worse, you could share to much information that not even a psychiatrist want's to hear, like "I think my rectum is clear, stick your finger in", or "I'm so glad my chlamydia is gone!" the list goes on and on, I could think of hundreds of creepy/repulsive stuff to say in bed. The worst are as following: "you're so much better at that than my girlfriend", "this confirms my heterosexuality", "oops.. sorry..", "IMMA SMUSH YOUR PUSSY LIKE JACK DEMPSEY ON ADRENALINE AFTER KILLING A HOOKER WITH A RUSTY NAIL!" "you're my first one over 30". "you look like a legal Rebecca Black"
Buck up boys. If you fall asleep or doze off in any way, oyu're screwed, unless you've paid the lady (shame on you, me). It's embarrassing, insulting, you can choke the girl to death, she can stab you and steal your kidneys, she can rob you, you'll get laughed at, the list goes on and on. Don't fall asleep. Grow a pair, flick them, take the pain and keep the sex going.